Your Dark Passenger

It’s dark.  You think their are footsteps on the pavement behind you yet there’s nothing there each time you turn.  If you can just make it home before…There it was again.

Your house.  Finally.  Safety is now within your reach.

What was that?  You heard that, right?

Trembling hands make the keys slip from your fingers.  Calm down, you tell yourself.  There’s nothing to fear.  Unlock the door, go inside, bolt the lock…And then the gleaming red eyes of the vampire are only inches from your own…

Fear Week continues.

Why do we fear the vampire?

Okay, so I know most of us here don’t fear vampires and quite frankly, I can’t imagine fearing a real vampire.  Perhaps I would feel differently on that point were I dealing with a rogue real vampire who refused to follow the guidelines found within the Black Veil (we’ll get to that soon, I promise).  For the purposes of this discussion let’s set aside reality and deal only with mythical vampires.  You know, Dracula, Lestat, Edward Cullen…(I’ll wait while all the fan girls in the world stop screaming)

Anyway…What is it about vampires that has struck fear in our hearts throughout history?  Hmm.  Let’s think about that.

1. The Blood.  Yeah, vampires drink our blood until we die.  Not exactly at the top of my list of ways to day.  (Still hoping to drown under the chocolate waterfall after going into a chocolate coma once I have awesome power.)
2.  The Beds.  You know something about sleeping in a box made for the dead is a little creepy.  If it weren’t, wouldn’t we all sleep in coffins instead of beds to break ‘em in before we die?  Come to think of it, I wouldn’t want to sleep in the dirt either and I’ve seen vampires do that, too.  (Again, mythical vampires.)
3. The Bite.  Call me crazy, but I’m not a big fan of physical pain so having someone’s fangs - that may or may not have been brushed recently - slash into my pretty porcelain neck does not sound awesome.
4. The Bats.  I’ve never been a fan of the bat.  Maybe it has something to do with watching too much Scooby-doo as a kid and seeing all of them fly out from under the bridge, but I don’t have a fond place in my heart for them.  Come to think of it, I’ve never understood why vampires turn into bats.  Does that seem stupid to anyone else?
5. The Bad Accent.  Vampires “vant to suck your blud!”  Oddly enough, that doesn’t even make me think of vampires.  Do any of y’all remember Duck Tails? (woo hoo!) I can’t remember her name, but the sorceress chick who was either supposed to be a witch or a vampire or a goth duck always spoke that way when she was going after Scrooge McDuck’s lucky dollar or penny or whatever. (You know, the secret of how he made all his money that he had converted into gold coins so he can dive into them in his giant money silo when it was time for a swim?)  Crap…does anyone remember her name?  It’s gonna drive me nuts!

Hmm…not the most impressive list of reasons to fear a vampire, but I could only use things as fears that started with a ‘b’ this evening.  (Today’s Sesame Street Your Dark Passenger has been brought to you by the letter B and the number 974.)  So, what do you think?  If that kind of undead, immortal, super-strong, death-dealing vampire was fact rather than fiction, would you be scared?

Good thing real vampires aren’t like that.  Personally, I’ve got enough to worry about over here, dark passengers.  I’m pretty sure the Boogey Man is under my bed.  That’s right.  The Boogey Man and Magica DeSpell (yep, I googled it) are after me because I’ve uncovered their 2012 plot.

Jen

“Let your dark passenger come out to play…Be your own nemesis!”

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